For Mothers...

It has been said that if the work mothers do on a daily basis could be translated into a paycheck, accounting for the around-the-clock hours in which they spend mothering - counseling, chauffering, teaching, nursing, entertaining and simply loving - she should be paid a six-digit salary.

Most mothers who hear this, understand the rationale completely, despite the fact that they are biologically wired to adapt to the needs of their children. It's almost as though they can't help but cater to their children's needs. It's a natural gift that money can't possibly buy.

A mother will hear the merest gurgle of her baby in another room. The anatomy of her ear is literally shaped for it. She will discern sadness in her daughter's eyes when there are no tears, fear in her son's when there are no words.

She knows what it's like to be engaged in a project while juggling a throng of interruptions. There is a spat to be resolved, a cut to be healed, a homework problem to be read and, amidst all of this, the phone is ringing. Her own work will have to wait. Her child comes first. Most likely, the interruption will lead to less dollars, more clutter, and the chewing away of her patience. At the day's end, to her partner, it may look as though she has accomplished nothing. Her face may appear weary, her words agitated, and her mood grey. She has accomplished so much and yet none of it shows.

She hears the cynics, judging her a hint of sarcasm. The kids are in school all day! What more can one ask for? I feel compelled to enlighten the misguided folk. While a mother's children are at school, one of two situations is most likely happening.

The first is this: When her beeper goes off at 6 a.m, she starts the job inside of her home before driving to the one outside of it. It is likely that her part-time 'mother's hours' paycheck will help to fund groceries. When her child is sick, she will need to tap into her pay to pay someone else or stay home and be docked for it. In short, the two jobs that she works - inside and outside of the home - will not be compensated fairly.

The second situation, less demanding in my humble opinion, is that she will eat up the time while her child is at school to manage household chores, appointments, meals, and schedules - in attempt to strive for balance, organization, and a 'warm place to fall on' for her family.

Depending upon her unique circumstances, she must choose an option that works for her family, with her children at the center. Their health and wellness depends on her choice and she does not take it lightly.

Regardless of this choice, she will make it while juggling her child's needs with her own. Simply going to work to earn money for her intellect, coasting in and out of projects, and capitalizing on merit and bonus pay is not an option for a mother. She must be creative. She must split her needs in thirds and prioritize. She is last on her list.

Mother's Day is a time to reflect on all that she accomplishes. It's a day to make her feel first - a time to see beyond the pile of clothes in the closet and the peanut butter stuck to the counter. A mother's job is like a quilt. It's a patchwork of squares that create a warm fabric to wrap yourself up in.

You may not see the finished product at first. But when you see the glow in your son's face when he slides into homeplate or the determination in your daughter's when she shoots a winning basketball - remember that - a mother's love is in the distance, the glow of a sunset.

Someone reassured that boy that he's going to have a great game while handing him a clean uniform. Someone told that girl that she's a natural on the court after searching three different stores for the right set of sneakers.

A mother is the instrument behind a melody and the note before the song.

My hope for Mother's Day is that you will pocket a mother's love like a favorite pack of gum. You will visit it, unwrap it, and savor its flavor. You will remember that what's she's truly looking for does not have to come in a Tiffany's box (though it certainly wouldn't hurt!)

When it comes to what a mother needs, think of the quilt. Do small things for her daily,create your own fabric of love and appreciation for her. Hold back a complaint. Choose a compliment. Listen to her, regardless of whether or not you feel the same way! Make her feel just as important as she makes your child feel. Each and every day.